Just as children have areas to learn as they grow up, there are mental skills that parents need to learn as their children grow up too. Today, I'm going to introduce you to the mental skills that adult guardians should learn!
1. How to get rid of anxiety.
When you first meet your child, you might be filled with insecurities: the feeling of anxiety when holding your baby, when you start weaning your baby, and even when you play with your baby might not away. No matter how good an adult is in their social life, they are always beginners in the field of child rearing, so they can't help but feel insecure. There is always that nagging doubt of whether you are doing well.
But think about it. It is natural that all beginnings in the world are anxious and difficult. At this time, no matter how good the advice people give around you is, it might be difficult for you to accept. Therefore, from now on, even if the progress is slow, it is better to make a resolution to decide: 'I will get used to childcare and relieve this anxiety'.
2. How to secure my rest time.
I agree with the saying that 'Mom and Dad are happy for the child to be happy', but in order for Mom and Dad to be happy, you need to secure enough rest time. However, in reality, it is not easy to secure enough rest time. The words ‘rest time’ themselves might create stress. In times like these, we need to find a compromise between relaxation and parenting and figure out what we feel most comfortable and happy with doing.
For some people, procrastinating may be the way to go, but for others, a dirty house itself is stressful, so doing chores can make you happier. Remembering that your energy is limited and think about how you will distribute and use this energy. Learning to secure your rest time will enable healthy parenting in the long run.
3. How to alleviate self-pity and acknowledge your achievements.
Sometimes for new parents, every moment comes with apologies. You feel sorry for having to send the child to daycare, and if the child is often sick, the parents also feel at fault. However, this feeling of regret or guilt does not actually have a positive effect on our behavior. It just makes us nauseous. Guardians are human too, and every human being has shortcomings and imperfections.
Therefore, rather than feeling 'sorry' for your child because of your shortcomings, think about your strengths as a parent and feel proud of that part. If you spend less time feeling self-pity, you'll be less emotionally drained, so you can allocate that energy to a wider range of areas.
4. How to respond to other people's meddling in parenting.
When you are raising a child, you hear a lot of meddling. It's advice, but it can feel tiring and nagging to hear. However, it is nearly impossible for us to change the behavior of others. Therefore, it is important to find your own protection method to respond to when you hear other people's parenting meddling.
For some, it may be 'letting it go through one ear', and for others it may be precisely pointing out that 'I would rather you didn’t talk like that'. Please find the protection method you are most comfortable with depending on the situation or relationship. Just as we protect our children, we must also protect and cherish our hearts.